Fighting on Tuesday
“They started fighting on a Tuesday. It’s still Tuesday. “Same desert, different tantrum.” A satirical reference to 5th June 1967—when the Six-Day War began. Decades later, Gaza still bleeds from its aftermath. Occupation. Blockade. History on loop.
Lopsided Umbrellas
A stern letter from the Ministry of Lopsided Umbrellas has arrived: Poobah warns against reckless custard usage. Yes, again. You know what you did.
World Sauntering Day
Today is World Sauntering Day, which means rushing is strictly prohibited. Poobah took five steps, had three cups of tea, and somehow still made history. Slow down. The moss knows where it’s going.
Poobah visits the Taj Mahal
Poobah visits the Taj Mahal, mistakes it for an over-the-top apology gift, and reflects on how love often gets lost in translation. Attempts to install a sarcastic plaque. Escorted out.
Liquidity locked
Liquidity locked. Cape loaded. Gibbins grumpy. The only thing Poobah hasn’t renounced… is victory.
Fofinha mark Hand Holding
Poobah and Princesa Fofinha mark Hand Holding Day the only way they know how. With quiet treaties, palm conspiracies, and a bird that clearly wants in on the deal. $POOBAH forever in safe hands.
Yacht Club
Commodore Buckminster “Bucko” Bletheridge of the Bafflington Yacht Club (No Yachts Division) has spoken: “Presale ends tomorrow, landlubbers. Half of you still think there’s another cruise after this one. Newsflash: there isn’t. I’ve reserved you a seat, but not a yacht. Miss the boat and you’ll be paddling in your pants.” Bucko owns 14 captain’s […]
Fork be with Ewe
From the Temple of Sacred Cutlery on Planet Baa’thlehem, Poobah Says “May the Fork be with Ewe, said the Shepherd-Jedi with mutton wisdom. For even in galaxies far away, lambs follow the weirdest leaders.”
The Mootual’s Moo-tivation
“Join the herd, moo with pride, and never let anyone tell you you’re just another cow in the field.”
Dr Frack’s Thursday Theorem
“Remember: All inventions work perfectly on Thursdays, provided you don’t ask how.”
